I am sometimes driven to purchase items I neither need or on a long term basis want. Over time and with a concerted effort I have become better at resisting the pull but I often think of the real reason I have the need to buy.
When I go to my closet to get dressed I find ample items with which I can cover my body, yet on stroll through Target and I am filled with a longing for a variety of T shirts, skirts, sweaters....Some carry exciting percentage off tags and are just my size! If I cave and buy them surely I will be more fulfilled, more complete, more something, right? Sadly the truth I have come to realize is no new shirt, lipstick or purse will make me prettier, smarter, or in any way improved. I will still be me and now I will have less money. I almost always regret the purchases by the time I get home.
I have so frequently fallen into this trap that I have imposed a total ban on shopping for recreational reasons. If I am deprived of the temptation my shopping will be limited to things that are actually needed. This approach has really helped me. I am far less comfortable with depriving my girls. I know they do not really need much of the toys, clothes, movies and games I buy for them but it makes me feel good to give them more than I had as a kid. At the same time I worry that giving them too much will leave them with warped values. I had so very little growing up that what I did have was very valuable to me. My girls don't seem to have the same reverence for any of their own toys. Do they not appreciate things because they come so easy to them or am I just seeing it through my grown up lens?
I made an attempt for our holiday gifts last year to be more meaningful and less numerous. I am proud to say that one of my daughters favorite gifts was her sleepy snake. I made sleepy snake out of a pair of old striped tights stuffed with cotton balls a few of them scented with lavender. In short order she bit off the felt forked tongue but still loves it just the same. Now that makes me feel more fulfilled and complete.
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You know, I often wonder the same thing about what I am doing. I try to be very aware of what and when I am buying for the boys. I think in some ways that it is just a part of the culture, and partly due to our desire to see our children have what they can have/need. Does that make sense? What do I know though? I bought S a Leapster 2 with Jedi Math game as his Santa present for this year. :P It was a great deal ($40 for both), but does he really need it? Probably not. Sigh. I struggle too.
ReplyDeleteAhhh but who could resist a Jedi math game. It is M's birhtday tomorrow and she is getting a new outfit that I could not pass up with a big sunshine on it and an MP3 player that is "just like her sisters" that is how it was on her list "just like my sisters". Every 7 year old NEEDS an MP3 player right??
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